[[ life, less ]]

Friday, October 19, 2007

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goddamnit. counting down the days to my tp- 5 more days to go!

am i really prepared to go thru the test? trying hard not to think bout it though impossible. everytime it comes into mind, i feel my heart pace fast. i know i will panic on that day, now i cant do anything but try to settle my heart down. i know i cant afford to fail, im even worrying bout where to get the money for the test. my mom and dad will have a heart attack.

this driving had gotten me into a real mess. im struggling and suffocating from all the financial support its draining me of. i've worked part time but all the money goes into it, i had to sought help from my parents which all along, im very unwilling to. they've got their own problems too.. indeed i shopped, lemmi see.. its my first time getting 2 shoes at one go, my first shopping spree in 19 years. maybe not even a shopping spree yet, just few clothes and trying to find stuffs at the most budget rate.

and the next problem surface, wat full time job should i look for? i have to start saving for my dip course and his bdae present after getting my license. thats why i cant afford to fail! i dont want to postpone my plan again, especially my studies.

oh god, god, god, god, god.. just let me get this over fast. suffocating, in fact suffocated.
pray real hard. humans, thats what they'll do when they're desperate..

[[ cheers ]] |2:25 AM|